الخميس، 22 سبتمبر 2011

Kids Having Babies

Kids with Kids
I happened to catch a video on youtube titled, “Kids Having Babies” and it was about just that. It began by stating that a school in America had 17 girls get pregnant and that it was “no accident”, after this statement they showed a clip from the film "Juno", where she playfully remarks on the "positive" marker on her pregnancy test (so much fun!) So it's no surprise that the video began mentioning teen pregnancy and the media.

Since so many young people grow up in front of a television set, it’s pretty damn important.

Then, text comes on the screen stating that the U.S has the highest rate of teenage pregnancy of all developed countries. Afterwards, it follows a 14 year old girl who appears to be quite far along in her pregnancy and films the nurse speaking to her. The girl talks about how her friend can see the baby moving on the stomach and that she can’t, indicating that pregnancy is not uncommon in her group of friends. The nurse says that teen pregnancy is such a large problem because people like her - people who belong to the public health sector, have not done enough in terms of birth control education. From what I hear about the U.S, sex education is not very comprehensive.The nurse states that once a month girls come to her for pregnancy tests, at the end of every cycle. This obviously is illustrating that these young girls are having sex and risking pregnancy nearly every time, likely from lack of sexual education.
I dolefully remember that in high school, some of the girls in my grade were having sex as early as grade 7 and 8 (I’m not kidding). I would ask how they stay safe and they would say condoms or the “pull out” method. None of them seemed to be on the birth control pill until much later, which I assume has a lot to do with them not wanting to tell their parents or doctors that they were indeed having sex. However, I don’t think at 12 or 13 years old that anyone, male or female really grasps the concept of sex and probably assumes a condom will work 100% of the time or pulling out is a good form of birth control. Since I had a small class, only a few girls got pregnant, the youngest being 15.
Nevertheless, in the video the nurse talks about the girls actually wanting to have the children; to have someone to love them unconditionally. I have heard this a lot and I clearly can’t say this is true for every young girl - I don’t work with pregnant teens and I don’t know the exact statistics. Regardless, I think this whole idea of “wanting a baby” comes from a lack of education on sex, birth control and relationships. Often, at least from what I remember of sexual education, we as girls were never talked to about forming sexual relationships or about boys pressuring us into sex, particularly older boys. It seemed to me that most of the girls who were having sex in my class were having sex with older boys, not with their peers.
The young girl in the video tells the nurse that the baby was a plan, she and her 17 year old boyfriend had planned to have a child. The nurse asked if she was happy about the plan, and she said “kind of”, she said she felt she was too young but did not feel that way until after she became pregnant.

What upset me the most was when the nursed asked, “Will he be there for the birth?”
The young girl responded, “No
Now, I’m not speaking for everyone, but I know I was a hell of a lot different at 14 than I was at 17. Both are young, but 14 is just a baby, most girls have just started their period a year prior to that. I believe not only is there a lack of birth control options and education but also a lack of communication surrounding relationships. There’s so much pressure at this age to feel the need to impress the opposite sex, to feel desired or loved. I think it’s horrible that we are to feel this way as young girls, it shouldn’t be so. It seems from the time you hit about 12, life becomes about getting attention, competing with other girls and hating your body. It depresses me just to think about my self-concept at 14 years old.
Yet, the nurses, doctors, teachers, and parents want to pretend this isn’t the reality for young girls, and because of that they cover their eyes and plug their ears. The result is that these girls are getting into abusive relationships, becoming pregnant, and spending their all of their energy trying to look “sexy” instead of having fun and getting an education. Caregivers will repeat like broken records that it is "normal young female behavior." It's normal for young girls to spend all their time obsessing about sexual relationships, buying and wearing pounds of makeup and starving themselves. I think it's bullshit - not some natural phenomenon.
The video claims that America’s teen pregnancies are on the rise for the first time since 1991. This is sad. What caused the decline for such a long time and what is causing the increase? I speculate the lack of comprehensive sexual education in ALL states and the amount of new media emerging since 1991. The influence of the media and how it tries so hard to sexualize girls has huge implications. The media is powerful in changing minds and behaviors and since the message to young girls is “find a hot boyfriend, please him, and make sure you’re sexually attractive”, the adolescent forecast is looking pretty stormy.
by Owl Eyes at 6:38 PM

Pregnancy Pact!?! You're Only 15

I'm seventeen years old and a senior in high school. I recently had a baby.

My friend Brittany, also had a baby. We were the first ones in years to ever be pregnant in our high school.

Brittany mentioned to me the other day that a few girls two grades lower than us are starting a pregnancy pact to have babies by the time they are done with high school.

I, myself, am struggling with the open adoption I'm going through with my daughter. And to hear such arrogance from little girls who have no idea what they are getting into.

My situation, is different than other teen moms, so I'm not judging the fact that they want kids, but the way they are going about it is just insanity.

16 and Pregnant Recap: Surprise! Izabella’s Eight Months Pregnant
Written By Lauren 1 Jun 2011

Tuesday’s 16 and Pregnant introduces us to Izabella Tovar and her boyfriend Jairo Rodriguez from Draper, Utah. Izabella lives at home with very supportive parents and is a rising sophomore at a local Catholic school. She has spent the summer hanging out with Jairo, her boyfriend of three months and avoiding her friends, as she is trying to keep her pregnancy a secret. The couple is expecting a boy in September.

At seven and a half months, Izabella goes to visit her best friend Cassidy, and her bump reveals why she’s there before she even needs to say a word. Cassidy admits that she had heard rumors of her friend’s pregnancy but was waiting to hear it from her. Cassidy promises to help Izabella maintain her studies. Her parents take a cue from Izabella and Cassidy and decide to spill the beans to the rest of the family. Her uncle paints a pretty harsh, yet spot-on, description of what likely lies ahead for the young couple.

Izabella makes her first public appearance at church, and her parents decide to throw her a baby shower so she can see more of her school friends, since she is currently working on assignments from home. Izabella is excited to be able to catch up with her friends, but she’s disappointed that Cassidy is a no-show.

At a family dinner, Izabella’s father Erik says he is disappointed in his wife, Vi, because of how lenient she has been with their daughter. He says he somewhat blames Vi for being more of a friend than a mother and should have talked to Izabella more about sex and its consequences. I am totally drinking his Kool-Aid until I realize, um, he could have done the same. I understand the bond of mothers and daughters, but if he thought his wife was too concerned with being a buddy, Erik could have stepped in to be the parent.

Cassidy has been avoiding Izabella since missing the baby shower. Izabella is upset but has to other things to think about as she and Jairo head to her thirty-eight week check-up and her blood pressure is high. To avoid any potential complications, the doctor decides to induce Izabella at the end of the week. With this news, the couple must decide quickly their next move. Luckily, Izabella’s mom runs a daycare, so childcare isn’t an issue, but of course, Jairo is moving in with his pregnant girlfriend. Thankfully, Izabella’s parents put two big stipulations on their new tenant–he must keep up with his studies and enroll in college, and he WILL NOT be sharing a bed with their daughter (a little late for that rule, but what can you do?).

The couple gets an early start on September 17th, induction day. They head to the hospital as soon as Izabella blow dries Jairo’s hair (??). As labor begins, Jairo admits he doesn’t want to see any of the birthing business and plans to stay up near Izabella’s head. After fourteen hours of labor, she is finally able to start pushing, and sixteen hours in, there is still no baby. Her doctor is extra chirpy, and after a final pep talk and push, Enrique Jairo is born.

Jairo takes to fatherhood, and while Izabella is disappointed that none of her friends come to visit, her biggest supporter comes in the form of Jairo’s cousin. He comes to see the young couple and talks about his first few weeks in college, his political science major, and his plans to go to law school. He lectures Jairo on the importance of choosing a path that will benefit his new child, and tells Jairo he better not raise the baby like a little gangtser. Izabella would do well to have this cousin baby-sit often!

It’s exhausting for both Jairo and Izabella, but they work well together. The couple prepares to head back to school, Izabella to high school and Jairo to community college. Izabella’s uncle comes down hard on Izabella’s family for supporting the couple while they go to school. The uncle feels like Jairo should go to work to support his new family. While I see his point, Izabella’s dad thinks the couple will fare better in the long run with an education, and I see his point even more. Here’s hoping Jairo keeps up his end of the bargain.

On her first day back to school, Izabella tries to clear the air with her best friend. Cassidy admits that she was distant because her feelings were hurt that Izabella kept her pregnancy a secret. An angry Jairo picks Izabella up from school, and something tells me that his college enrollment didn’t go as planned. He totally shuts down when Izabella tries to talk to him, and he storms out and leaves the house. When Jairo returns, the family sits down to talk to him. An embarrassed (and rightfully so) Jairo admits that he has been lying to everyone about finishing high school online, and has in fact not graduated.

Erik takes his daughter to dinner to discuss the gravity of Jairo’s actions. He sits down with Jairo and sets forth a pretty fair game plan as to Jairo’s schooling and the couple’s living situation. The episode ends with the young couple with Enrique at the baby’s Baptism and Izabella reflecting on the importance of having such a supportive family.

On Mtv’s aftershow, Izabella reveals that she kept her pregnancy a secret because she had seen how badly a fellow classmate had been treated when she became pregnant a few months before Izabella. Izabella is still with Jairo, calling him “amazing.” He is working, going to school and helping raise Enrique. Izabella herself says she did not expect to see such a change in the young father, but the new family seems to be thriving with the support of her parents.

What are your thoughts? How can i stop them or help them

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